Wednesday, April 11, 2007

"emo"

Here's part of a series of poems I'm working on, I'm trying to write them like a symphony with different sections to form one larger work. I'm sure there's a name for that, but I don't know it. Yes, I know it's kind of "emo". Get over it! ;) It'll make sense in context eventually.


Hear the dark rain Pound on the windshield,
I down your warmth.
I am Silent. I am Screaming.

Watch the headlights Pass us by slowly,
I catch your eyes.
Your eyes they Marvel. Your eyes are Masked.

Drink the delight Poured on our whispers,
We loose the way.
We are Naïve. We are Knowing.

Feel the thick air Pull apart and spoil,
You meet my fault.
I am Quiet. I am Crying.



Is the meter too obvious? How about the similar starting letters/sounds (P's, Qu-C, N-Kn, etc.)

2 comments:

jase said...

Alliteration is supposed to be obvious Laura. No worries there. And actually, I did not notice it. ;)

fishie said...

HEllo! Come home soon!!! Miss you. Better come for the play...
~kassie